Unmatched Lesbian Sex at Midlife

Wed, Aug 15th, 2018 @ 7:57:54 PM

LGBT Dating & Relationships

Submitted by: Sharon Monaghan

Most girls who work out they’re lesbians later in life have some jitters when they’re facing their first sexual experience. As a coach, I frequently hear questions like, “What do I do?” and “How do I do it?” I also regularly hear comments like, “What if I am unable to please her?” and “What if I do not like it?” Please, relax! Remember, lesbian sex is, above all, FUN. There are some real positives about lesbian sex that really can reduce strain, compared to hetero sex.

* There are no issues about getting pregnant. This is big. No contraception, no “slipping up” and then having to attend on the fringe of your seat 3 weeks to work out if you have missed. Absolutely freeing.

* Then there’s the issue of orgasms. Men have “one and done,” so essentially in hetero sex when he is’s satisfied, the experience is over. Not so with lesbian sex. With multiple orgasm capacity it lasts as long as we need it to.

* Lesbian sex isn’t vanilla. Simply by reason of the certain fact that it IS lesbian sex! It’s imperative not to fall into a rut, though. Keep it clean.

* Communication is easier, since you talk the same language. Males and females have different communication styles and this may finish up in misunderstandings when it comes to sex.

* Then naturally, the best advantage is that you are having sex with a lady, which naturally is what you have been wanting!

Now, let’s say you have been going out with a girl a number of times and you suspect you are getting close. If the woman is also just coming out ( this constantly happens to mid-lifers ) there’s occasionally less stress surrounding the loss of your lesbian virginity. You can learn together. While there are “how to” books available on the topic, you likely will just finish up doing what comes natural. I do endorse the books as a cool way to open communication about the subject and perhaps expand your idea of what makes up sex and your exploration of each other. When the experience does happen, you will probably find it a completely natural and great experience.

But some girls do describe their first time as strange. This is totally OK. You’ve been used to having hetero sex and this is something new. If the weird feeling continues, or you are feeling extraordinarily uncomfortable or do not like lesbian sex, perhaps you must rethink your alignment. If you are stepping out with a girl which has experience, you can feel under more stress. So, why not let her take the lead? Again, relax. Do what comes natural. There are no right and wrong methods to have sex. Hear your better half, not only what she’s’s saying, but her soon…breathing, complains, sighs. It is feasible to punish her, but again, watch your better half’s expressions, listen carefully and take your cues from that. Keep communicating, before, during and after sex. Sex is always a learning experience when you’re with a new partner. So, basically each time with somebody new will be a first time. Each of you has different things that turn you on and you need to learn that about one another.

While you will have read books or heard others’ experiences and you suspect you know what lesbian sex is, the actuality is that there’s a great amount of adaptation in sexual styles and desires among girls. Some women may wish oral sex, others may think it’s a turn-off, some ladies may like penetration, others do not some women may love their nipples touched and for others it may do nothing, or be upsetting. Even if your better half is experienced, it’s still her first time with YOU, too.

Make certain she knows that you are a lesbian virgin. That’ll be something she is’s thinking about…making sure it’s excellent for you the 1st time. So, the field won’t be as uneven as you could imagine. When having lesbian sex for the 1st time, remember, there isn’t any right and wrong, just what you both like to do. There are few rules, just be natural and keep communicating – stay mindful of how she feels and let her know how you are feeling and what you like, too. Keep these things in mind and I am sure of one thing – your very first time will certainly not be your last!

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